SueAnn Porter

How about the guy at the gym that does one set on the machine, doesn’t wipe it off while it drips of his sweat, then paces back and forth through the other machines, with headphones on, singing intermittently and scaring the crap out of each time he starts to sing, and then goes back to the machine for another set with the weights on the highest they will go so that he can GRUNT with every rep?

How about waitresses that ask if you want cream or lemon with your tea, then after you tell them ‘cream’ they return with tea and a lemon slice? Where is my cream?

Or the waitress who doesn’t write anything down (I’ll loan you a pen and a pad) and returns to the table three times to ask how you wanted your meat cooked.  I mean, I know my memory is not sharp lately and that is why God invented notebooks and pens.

And what about those writers who start sentences with “and”. Don’t they know better, or worse, don’t they care? [Looks in mirror] Yes, I do that often. This is because A) I don’t like to make long sentences because both the reader and the writer can lose their place and 2) I think of something additional to add to the sentence but don’t want to change the verb tenses. Or something.    {A and 2 is from Mad About You}

Then there’s the teenager who is driving slowly through the intersection while you are waiting to make a left turn, and as she goes by, you notice that she is texting while driving. Grrr. Does your mother know what you do?

Priuses, or is that Pri-i? You know the little cars that get 50 miles to the gallon and you don’t hear them coming but suddenly they are in front of you, hyper-mile-ing, which means going as slowly as possible but just fast enough so that you cannot run up to them and slap them.

Why is it that when you pass road construction, there is always ONE guy working and six others watching him? There are two more guys off to the side smoking cigarettes, and an old guy, probably the boss, on a cell phone? This is your tax dollars at work.

Well that’s just off the top of my head. What bugs you?