Another day, another diet.
I’ve lost probably hundreds of pounds in my life. And gained it all back. I know, Boo Hoo. I know I’m not the only one. My two biggest issues are 1) eating after supper ! That is not, not, not something I should do and 2) I get soooo depressed at times, that I would rather eat a chocolate cake than do bodily harm to myself. Ok, so I use food like a drug, like a fix, like a heroin addict. And I’m not judging heroin addicts. I feel their pain.
Years ago when I smoked cigarettes, it was the same thing. Painful emotions, with no clue how to process them, lead to a cigarette. So I just replaced that behavior with food.
Yes, I work out at the gym. Yes, I know an apple is better than a candy bar.
It is the emotional pain that I don’t know how to process that drives me back to the junk food, like an alcoholic. (again, I’m not judging here!)
I remember reading the late comic Louie Anderson‘s book in which he wrote letters to his late father. His father was an alcoholic, and Louie obviously had food problems. He said “Dad, I am as hungry as you were thirsty.”
So here comes MORE guilt. I’m a Christian. Jesus said “whoever comes to me shall never be hungry and never thirst.” Obviously, this was spiritual-speak. I am supposed to take the crappy feelings to Jesus and leave them there.
My problem is I have not successfully learned how to do that.