Does anyone remember laughter?

It has been pointed out to me that  lately my posts have been quite dreary, as if I had been renting a room at the House of Usher from Edgar Allen Poe. So I will attempt to lighten it up for a while.

First, some of my favs from Steven Wright:

“Why do they call them apartments, when they are all connected?”

“If Pro is the opposite of Con, what is the opposite of Progress?”

“Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.”

“What’s another word for thesaurus?”

“I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.”

“I’m writing an unauthorized autobiography.”

BUMPER STICKERS:

“Paddle Faster! I hear banjos!”

“Experience Wildlife – raise Twins!”

“Where there’s a will, I want to be in it.”

“All generalizations are false.”
“Few women admit their age. Fewer men act it.”

“Always remember you are unique, just like everyone else.”

“Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes!”

“I am the man from Nantucket.”

“Sarcasm: It’s better than aggravated assault.”

“Without ME, it’s just AWESO”

Mechanic’s T-shirt: “I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.” http://www.cafepress.com/+i_couldnt_repair_your_brakes_dark_tshirt,110773969

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